Christian Mingle

Oh, okay, get this....I've now broken my own rule. About two weeks ago, I joined ChristianMingle.com. They are much more reasonable in price than Eharmony and their name is really self-explanatory. It was a learning experience writing my profile, as it also has been exploring the responses and the message boards. As I've gone through the process, I've learned gradually what it is that's really important to me, and how to get it down in writing so that I am as specific, and as positive about myself as possible.
The message boards are a great way to express opinions and start conversation, and the responses give me a better idea of what guys are wanting and what's important to them.

So, what do I like?:

Clever descriptions with details.
(Looking at many profiles can be tedious; and I need something to draw me in & keep me interested. This is hard for guys, but so it must be. :)
The maximum amount of pictures.
(I've never seen you before, so let me get as many glimpses as possible :)
Completed questions and answers.
Clear pictures of FACES
A commitment to church every week.
I can't count how many wonderful profiles I've looked at that I've ditched because the person only attends church once or twice a month.
A good sense of humour that comes out in the writing.
(this keeps me interested :)
Someone who doesn't mind rain or overcast weather.
This is a personal preference of mine. It's a hard one because most guys love the outdoors and sunny weather seems to go hand in hand with that. I also find that guys seem to be afraid to put down that they "prefer" rain. It's almost as if they are afraid women will see this as a negative, or that they'll be turned off by it.
Someone who'd rather not have children.
This is also a difficult one, because it seems to put a "dent" in the dream: Christian family man...Christian mother, wife.
I've waited a long time for my husband, and I've made a decision...I want him to myself; to be able to share a life with him and have a few dogs and a couple of cats, and go on trips a couple times a year.
This I think is unconventional for a "Christian" dating site because most people are thinking Christian family, service... so this will be interesting.

What do I not like?:

Profiles with no pictures (!!!)
It is such a turn off to get that glimmer of hope that someones curious about me, and then not even get to know what they look like! Be bold, put yourself out there!
(A curious footnote is that many Calvary Chapel profiles have no pictures.) I think the feeling is discretion... modesty. It sorta keeps alive the mystery of what God is going to do; but there's a problem: I feel extremely awkward corresponding with someone when I don't even know what they look like. So, these are profiles that I don't pursue.
Introductions that are only one liners. Come on... put more into it than that. Intros that are only one line offend me because it suggests to me that the guy figures I won't like him in the first place. Okay, so then why are you wasting my time at all? Don't make me "dig," just tell me. Give me some info and then let me decide for myself. Don't be "mystical" just be real.
(Again, Calvary Chapel guys seem to be notorious for "one liner" introductions.) I think the idea is modesty; "Let's see where God takes this,"; that sorta thing. But to me, it's a major turn off, because if I were not interested, I wouldn't be looking.
Seeing only one picture under "Photos"... often the same one that shows up in the profile. I've never seen you before; give me as many reasons as you can to look at you again.
Profiles with no Q&A. To me, this is almost like cheating. How does CM even know you're such a match for me, if there is so little info about you? Really.
Photo's with indistinguishable faces.
Many profiles have pictures where a vehicle or boat is three or four times bigger than the person in the pic. The idea behind this could be trying to "show off" a particular "toy" or interest, and get a girl interested. But I wanna see the guy himself. Who am I talking to? I wanna see his features, especially his eyes.
(Many guys have on sunglasses, thinking that it makes them look cool (and in some cases it does) but guys have a better chance of keeping my interest if I can see their peepers :)

I did write my opinions about a girl checking out a guy (and does this break "the rule"? Guys have assured me that, no it does not... the attitude being that guys can't do all the work... that nany guys like to be noticed. Also, that guys want a "challenge," but not "Mission Impossible."
Strangely enough, before I ever "broke my own rule," I thought I was in a place where everything I'd ever wanted, was going to come to me on it's own...and everything was going into place. But the whole situation shattered... and nothing ever came of it. I've waited and waited on the Lord, being very careful to make sure I was not taking the reighns into my own hands (This is something THE LORD is gonna do, right... not me. So, I stayed out of the way, and tried to just live my life and see what would happen. Four years later, I am still single, and wondering what the heck happened. So I know now I need to get out there and take a risk... learn a bit about what's out there... and pray as I go. I wonder often if I am over stepping God's will, or if I'm supposed to search...I'm supposed to do this work...I'm supposed to learn these things about myself. I'm supposed to grow as a person. I'm confident that the Lord will lead me, and that I'll have the answers I'm looking for, and that someday, even the mysteries will be revealed as well.