The Dilemma in the Valley of the Dolls

As a little girl, I loved babies...and my room looked it...

Baby dolls, baby blankets, baby strollers, baby bottles...you name it. I had a doll cradle that my aunt had made for me, which I adored. But I also had some real baby items...a stroller, a swing, an infant seat. I particularly loved these...because I felt that much more like a mommy...a real mommy! The irony being that the real baby items often were about the same cost as the stuff for dolls.

Yes, I loved my babies. I would walk down the sidewalk with a stroller, dress them, swing them, rock them, swaddle them. I'd set my "kids" in a group and talk to them and read them stories...and dream of the day that I would have a real baby to do all those things with. It seems to me, there was a time when little girls DID look forward to these things. A doll was a precious, cute, thing that helped girls learn to be tender and sweet. The "fantasy" of motherhood would be enacted through them...and the reward was that someday, the dream would be real. I think I must've caught the tail end of "earning these rewards" because it seems like very soon after that, the "joy" of little girls mothering their dolls...began to fade.

Today, it seems as though there are three reasons for dolls: Collecting, nostalgia, and...just really creeping people out. I'll start with the last one first. At the East Martello Museum in Key West Florida, for example, there is one particular doll...called Robert. Robert is also known as "the haunted doll". So, the "creeping people out" part, has a lot to do with supposed paranormal activity. The story goes that Robert had a curse put on him by a certain housekeeper who became resentful when she became unemployed. This housekeeper was apparently into things like voodoo & casting spells, and she put one on this (rather sinister looking) child's toy. Apparently, the boy (named Robert) who owned the doll began to get in awful trouble for all sorts of "accidents" happening around the house. When questioned by his parents, the boy (Robert) would blame the doll Robert. But more than that, the boy would take the doll with him everywhere he went, the two seemed inseparable. Robert the doll, was eventually found inside a trunk up in the attic of Robert's house (after his death) and it is said that when the doll was removed from the trunk, very strange things began to happen around the house.

This is just one paranormal story (one of the stranger ones) regarding a doll that was to be feared because of a creepy myth surrounding it. Along those same lines, "Ghost Adventures" host, paranormal investigator Zak Baggans is almost as well known for his hatred of dolls, as he is for investigating the activity in general. This is because he says that dolls can hold or "house" negative energy. In several episodes, Baggans and his crew have relished making fun of several dolls seen in children's bedrooms, and houses out of the past, and present. Baggans and his crew's mockery of these precious little reminders of innocence, seemed to reach it's peak in the episode of "Ghost Adventures" centering around "The Island of the Dolls.".

In the canals surrounding Mexico City, is possibly one of the scariest tourist destinations ever. I've never visited there, nor do I intend to...but the story goes that the island's only resident, Don Julian Santana found the body of a drowned child in the canal waters. When he also found a doll floating in the water, he attached the doll to a tree on the island. He believed the island was haunted by the spirit of the child...and he was supposedly attempting to give her some peace. But then the one doll became more & more, and word had it that Santana began searching for dolls on his occasional ventures off the island, and also trading his home grown fruits and vegetables for dolls. The result, is now this incredibly ominous collection of trees...and dolls...some with heads, some without...some with limbs, some without. Some have their eyes poked out. Some still have rusty voice boxes that once made them laugh or cry. But in any event...it's all a freaky picture of premature death. These little symbols of all that is life-giving, loving and nurturing are now twisted, mutilated, ruined by the elements...their little bodies left abandoned to be eaten by crawling things.

So, the island is shown on TV, and little balled headed dollies everywhere are given the reputation of being scary and creepy and demon possessed. Not to mention, the many other paranormal shows where a child's doll suddenly opened it's eyes and said something like "Thanks for the hug." Crazy. But, I suppose, in an age where kids are getting their own cell phones in elementary school, combing a doll's hair and dreaming of being a mommy is no longer a priority.


I suppose collecting and nostalgia go hand in hand when it comes to dolls...but actually the "Creeping people out" factor fits in here as well, when you consider a fairly new phenomenon called Reborns. Put simply, Reborns are baby dolls that are designed to look and feel as much like real newborn babies as possible. Sounds like a cool idea right? Sure...until you get a look at one. These dolls are creepy because there really is no evidence that they are...dolls. Their skin, hair, eyes, limbs, toes fingers, are so life-like, that the line between reality and fantasy is completely blurred. And these little bundles of joy are not generally for children to play with; not when you consider that the cost of one can be almost as much as a hospital bill for a real baby! Never mind porcelain beauties in rectangular boxes with glass eyes that stare from behind a glass case. How about a Reborn nursery! Everything you could ever need for babies...that aren't real. Cribs, strollers, diapers (yes), and dresser drawers filled with matching outfits. We're basically talking adults playing with dolls that cost more than the cost of caring for an actual child...and then showing them off to friends down the street, or at the mall...stroller and all.

So what's the message here? What's the appeal? Those who create Reborns are known as "Reborners" and one doll can cost hundreds to thousands of dollars. But why does there seem to be some sort of freakish, bringing to life, Frankenstein sort of element to all of this? Dolls used to represent the pretend play, of a little girl growing up. She could practice being a mommy. She could practice holding & rocking and singing to her child, while always knowing that if she left her on the floor in the hall all night...this was perfectly okay... (duh)...she wasn't real. Remember the book "Baby Dear"? It's the story of a (now) big sister, seeing her mom and dad bring her newborn sibling home from the hospital. When the new baby comes home, daddy brings her big sister a doll, and big sister tries to do everything with her doll that her mother does with her newborn sibling. She looks up to her mother and emulates her, almost as if mommy and her oldest daughter are twins.

But the whole "Reborning" phenomenon seems to take this idea of a girl wanting to be like her mother, and turns it on it's head. As I said, these are not (usually) children's dolls...these dolls seem to be for adults wanting to be...children. But the whole process of making them, dressing them and displaying them, is very grown up indeed. It's serious business. Add to this, (as I said), the fact that the lines between real and pretend are completely blurred. In my opinion this can make Reborning, not paranormal, of course, but certainly a little spooky.

When I was a kid, porcelain dolls also represented growing up, just in a different way. These dolls were my first lesson in "We don't play with that, because we take special care of it.". It was like "graduation" from dragging your vinyl child by the wrist to play with you in the dirt, or putting your doll under water in the bathtub and watching the bubbles while her plastic body filled up with water. It's just pretend, remember? So these things were safe, they were innocent, they were tender. This was a child being a child...and then a child growing up. But I know not where to classify "Reborning" or the whole paranormal aspect to dolls.

I remember very clearly that all my dolls had identities. They were little people. The thing is, the line between real and pretend was always in place, as it should've been. Cabbage Patch Kids had adoption certificates kids could fill out, which again, gave a kid a sense of being a mommy...but this is a far cry from a middle aged woman sitting at lunch holding a "Reborn" that is...adorable, sure, but NOT a REAL BABY! So, adults want to be children, and kids? What do they do? They are not adults, but it seems the aults in their life...no longer want to be. Where does anyone, whether child or adult, learn to be a parent? Where do we learn to protect and nurture? Parents are being dumbed down with their kids, and kids are taking over. Is there an agenda here? Well, it's my personal belief that kids who are not allowed to be children, with protective boundaries, cannot handle adult situations when the time comes. What was once innocent and comforting and sweet pretend play, has now become evil and sinister...mixed up, something to be feared and hated...because otherwise, there's no appeal. Meanwhile, children are attached to their phones and attached to their tablets...bonding intimately with gadgets and machines. People whose kids have long since moved out are changing and dressing their Reborns that they bought with money they were supposed to use to retire.

Crazy. Just crazy. I much prefer the days when I wept because the Velveteen Rabbit was abandoned. The other toys in the room would not play with him. They believed he was not a real toy, because he wasn't shiny and brand new like the others. He was old, and faded with stitching coming loose and stuffing falling out. In plain English, he became "lame,"it was thought, because he seemed all used up...but not to the boy he belonged to! The bunny was the toy who received the most love. Guess what? He won! But today, this seems like ancient history. Toys are no longer held onto for as long as possible with sweet devotion and loyalty. Technology has taken over but not helped kids learn to cope. And adults don't know how to handle their children, provoked to anger, because they're bored to death...their sense of imagination dulled. Parenthood is no longer treated as an honorable thing...and such is the dilemma in the valley of the dolls.